The Next Gen does Family Guy

The Family Guy is doing an episode featuring the principle cast of Star Trek: The Next Generation. Based on the clip, it looks like the crew had no problem poking fun at themselves. And can I just say that young or old, live action or cartoon, Patrick Stewart can beam me up anytime. Go on, make it so, Picard.

Daydreams aside, the episode "Not All Dogs Go to Heaven" airs Sunday at 9 p.m. ET on Fox. Get Wired for more info.

Check it out:

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A forgotten hero of The Great Escape

Sixty-five years ago as of last night, Allied POWS at Stalag Luft III began their escape attempt (it was March 24, 1944). Out of the 76 men who escaped the German camp, only three made it to freedom; 50 of them were executed.

The escape was immortalized in the film "The Great Escape." U.S. Army Col. Jerry Sage is the war hero on whom Steve McQueen's character was based, though regretfully you never seem to hear much about him. Sage worked for 15 months on a three-tunnel escape plan while in the POW camp, which he told of in his book "Sage." The movie "The Great Escape" was based on the book of the same title by Paul Brickhill, but Sage's exploits are credited with helping form the movie's plot (though his own book wasn't printed until well after the movie was made).

According to his 1993 obituary in Variety, Sage:

"...earned the nickname 'Cooler King' because he was placed in solitary confinement 15 times in the Nazi camp.

In the movie, McQueen whiled away time in solitary with a baseball glove and ball.

After numerous breakout attempts, Sage, who worked for the U.S. Office of Strategic Service, made his final escape across Poland after being a POW for more than three years."

According to IMDB:

"Steve McQueen's character Hilts was based on amalgamation of several characters, including Major Dave Jones, a flight commander during Doolittle's Raid who made it to Europe and was shot down and captured and Colonel Jerry Sage, who was an OSS agent in the North African desert when he was captured. Col. Sage was able to don a flight jacket and pass as a flier otherwise he would have been executed as a spy. Another inspiration was probably Sqn Ldr Eric Foster who escaped no less than seven times from German prisoner-of-war camps."

There's not a lot out there about Col. Sage. I remember him coming to speak at a history class when I was in junior high in the '80s; he talked about how he could kill a man in two seconds with his bare hands. Even though he was well into his 60s at the time, I firmly believed him and didn't doubt he could still do it if need be.

Sage struck me as a tough old bird who gave a hell of a lot in service of the United States. He was a member of the OSS (Office of Strategic Services) in World War II, a predecessor of the CIA. Perhaps he kept such a low profile due to the nature of his work. He also seems to have led an incredibly interesting life. I wish there was more out there about him (heck, I wish at least that his book were still in print! You can find some used copies on Amazon and at Abebooks.).

Do you have more info or stories about Jerry Sage? Leave a comment and share the love!

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Gimme a man that smells like Capt. Kirk

He was the sexiest starship captain in the galaxy. Even the triple-wanged alien studs in the Delta Quadrant had nothing on James T. Kirk. He was H-O-T hot, even to a little kid watching Star Trek reruns in the '70s and dreaming of being his girlfriend (even though I wasn't quite sure what he got up to with those green slave girls).

Now all those die-hard fans living in their parents' basements and saving up for the next Con can boldly smell like no Trek geek has smelled before. With a splash of Tiberius, one of three new fragrances paying homage to Star Trek, any Trekkie (or Trekker depending on how anal you are about your sci-fi habit) can smell like a space-age stud. Splash some on, head down to the DQ, and brag to the giggly teenage counter staff, "Yeah, baby, like it? It's Tiberius. As in James Tiberius Kirk, captain of the Starship Enterprise. How 'bout you come over to my place and watch TOS on DVD? Bring a Dilly Bar, doll."

Seriously, I did love Trek and think these fragrances are sort of a fun and funny idea. I'd even buy the ladies' fragrance, Ponn Far (named for the Vulcan mating ritual) if I could find it on clearance for a buck or two (and it would have to be clearance, as these fragrances will set you back $30-$40 and I'm not *that* into the concept). It would be fun to say I had it, but not really worth much of an investment. The third fragrance, btw, is Red Shirt, apparently named for the expendable character that tended to meet an unpleasant end in each episode. I'm not sure who would want to smell like the guy who bites it 10 minutes into the episode; maybe you give that to the boss you don't really like or an annoying step-relative.

On the fence about placing an order? Here's more info on these far-out scents to help you decide.

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Remembering Bill Hicks

Tomorrow is the anniversary of the death of comic Bill Hicks, who died of cancer on Feb. 26, 1994. I really didn't know much about him until I watched a comedy special recently, and admit I still don't know much except he seemed to be very talented and died far too young. The Guardian newspaper calls him "one of the most influential standups of recent times," and even created a Bill Hicks quiz.

Before testing your knowledge, read more about his life on Wikipedia, including the allegations by some that Denis Leary hacked Hicks' material. You can see clips of Hicks' act on YouTube.

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Something sinister about Everybody Loves Raymond

I never kept up with Everybody Loves Raymond when it first aired. Now I catch an episode here and there in reruns, and I have to wonder: Were they drugging those kids? Seriously, if that were a real family and you went to their house, you'd be concerned about those kids. The tikes are rarely around, are often left unsupervised, and stay in their rooms playing quietly (one presumes, as the alternate prospect of them being tied in the closet is just too hard to accept of the seemingly sweet mom, Debra).

What's more, they eat quietly, don't jabber and yammer with loads of questions or otherwise prevent adults from holding a conversation, don't spill much (and it's never a big mess when they do), don't fight with each other, and quietly go off to their rooms with a nod the first time they're told to. Debra's gotta be dosing those kids with cough syrup or something. I'm still waiting for the episode where social services gets involved, 'cause something ain't right up in that house.

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Dating deal breakers gone wild

There's a funny video on Yahoo Shine about dating deal breakers, meaning what would cause you to just walk out on a date. The viewer comments below it are pretty good, too; check it out here.

Having finally found my Prince, I don't have to deal with the often less-than-delightful world of dating anymore. When I was a hot-mama on the dating scene, though, I don't think I ever walked out on a date -- but I should have a few times. Here are some of my dating deal breakers:

-Don't flirt with, or kiss, another woman in front of me and tell me it was kind of a dare. I'm outta there! (Or I should've been).

-Don't stay on your cell phone half the night talking to friends trying to determine what you'll do later that night if you don't get lucky (big hint: this behavior ensures you *won't* be getting any sweet lovin'!).

-Don't let the entire date consist of riding around in your car for hours, stopping only to buy a can of soda -- one can -- for us to share. And if you do, at least get the kind of soda I like! (OK, this one happened when I was in high school, but even then it was unacceptable, especially since the guy was a bit older and not a high-school kid himself).

-Open doors, pick up the check without flinching or making sure I see exactly how much it cost (I don't care if it was $10 or $100, accept my sincere thanks for the meal without acting like I might "owe you something" and should know exactly how much I owe you for), and just generally be a gentleman.

-Don't show up on my doorstep two hours after you stood me up, drunk, yelling my name and begging to be let in. Deal breaker, baby!

-Don't bring a couple of female "friends" along for the evening. I'm not looking to be part of your harem.

-Don't order yourself another drink as I arrive, but tell the bartender I won't be having anything as we're about to head out. Rude, cheap, and stupid (given that I don't drink much and I'm most likely to ask for tap water or a Diet Coke).

-Don't tell me about the horrible break up with your ex-wife, then shudder when I tell you about something I like because you recall that your ex liked that, too. If you've got the kind of baggage that you get relationship flashbacks, slowly step away from your date and into a therapist's office.

Can anyone top those?

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